According to statistics, not scattered socks or unwashed dishes, but money is to blame for the quarrels of loving spouses. A third of families can not agree on purchases, worried about mortgage payments and loans. And as many people are hiding from their own half, how much they spent so that there was no scandal.
We at Happy Worthy Life believe that true love can survive any financial storm. And the stories of Internet users that you read below will help you get around the sharp corners that arise in almost every marriage.
- I earn much more than my wife. I would feel damn bad if she had to beg me for money. I may be old-fashioned, but I took my marriage vows seriously. We are one. I love my wife and completely trust her. That is why we are still together. And we did not even talk about a separate budget. © guitarguy1685 / reddit
- We got married when we were midnight students, and from the very beginning we adhered to one rule: if we want to buy something more expensive than $ 50, we need to consult with our spouse before buying . We still use this system, though now the amount has become larger. © Lurcher99 / reddit
- My first marriage was at the age of 25, as soon as I had just finished my Masters, and started a job with a publishing house. Now it was a big and famous publication team, and despite not being an Undergraduate in English, I got a pretty high positioning at the company owing to quick promotions and good relations. I got married at that time to my college boyfriend, much against the wishes of my parents, who felt that as he was still starting out in his job and earning less than me, this would cause problems. He’d often joke how he was ‘going to live off my money’ and how I was the head of the family, but soon the jokes started pinching him, when even after three years of marriage he’d only had a menial promotion with no major change in salary. He soon started feeling guilty, and that turned to anger and frustration. What had started out happily, was now a bitter arrangement between two people. I hated coming home from work because I’d have to see him. Things went from bad to worse, and the fact that his wife earned at least 5 times more than him, hurt his ego a lot. In fact, after the divorce, I had to let him keep the car. He was near-broke. © Anonymous / Quora
- I work in a bank. Another loan repayment history. Somehow a client comes to me, age a little over 40, has long been paying off her loan, often with delays, and then she came to close completely. I’ve been familiar with her for several years, I talked to her. It turned out that she had found a man for herself, but he, before legitimizing the relationship, gave her an ultimatum so that she would be without loans. So she borrowed from her friends 2 million tenge ($ 5050 thousand dollars) to pay off the rest of her mortgage. © Argyntina19 / Pikabu
- Before the wedding, she asked her future husband about his loans. I have no debts, and the groom had some kind of consumer loan, which terribly enraged me. I agreed to marry him on the condition that he pay off his debts. Of course, after a few months, he forgot about his promise, so I took everything into my own hands. Now both salaries (mine and him) are dripping onto one account, from where he gets a fixed amount. Spent all the money in a day or could not stretch it for a month? Sorry, you won’t get a penny until the next salary . © Ma Concepcion / Quora
- I earned three times more than my ex-girlfriend. She believed that living with a separate budget was to divide all the money equally and dispose of it as you want. It turned out that in the event of her moving to me, I had to pay all my expenses, all her expenses and still “owed” her $ 300 a month . She seemed to think it was fair. Meanwhile, I basically paid for everything and everything, right up to dates and vacations. Money is the main reason we broke up. She believed that she was entitled to the luxury that my salary gives us. © CaptainDildozer / reddit
- I always dreamed that my wife and I would have a joint budget. We would simply combine all the revenues and spend from a common piggy bank. But when I gave a hint about this, my wife replied: “Are you crazy? I will not ask you for permission every time I want to spend money . ” Then I suggested another option: we maintain our separate accounts, but we have a common piggy bank where each of us contributes. To which the wife again replied: “If you earn more, then you must pay a more substantial amount than me.” I agreed, but asked if she, in turn, would contribute more when her salary increased. The wife refused. As a result, we began to keep completely different accounts, but we had a small joint account, into which each of us contributed $ 50 each month for household needs. © Daniel Tay / Quora
- I’m in my third marriage. I have a very limited idea of my husband’s financial situation. But I don’t ask, it’s enough for me that he fully provides for our family. I myself earn well, practically do not spend money, only on trifles. Two divorces taught me to have my own separate capital. Our approach to finance does not interfere with family life. © Mom Squared / baby.ru
- When my wife and I just got married, we agreed that she would make all the “small” financial decisions, but she would pass on all the serious financial decisions to me. This worked well for all 44 years of marriage. But, if you think about it, the situation when you had to make a serious financial decision did not arise … Hmm. © Rick Edmondson / Quora
- Everyone had their first year, but they mostly spent their husband’s money. Where I got my own, he was not interested. Now we divide his salary into 3 parts: one for the mortgage, the second we leave for our fixed expenses (apartment, groceries, kindergartens), and he gives me the third part. Well, I, as a true miser, put all this into a savings account.
- I divide my salary into 2 parts: one for expenses, the second for savings. From the savings we can take for repairs, for a large purchase (for example, we collected a car), for overhaul of the same car or for rest. That’s all, perhaps. © Zinaida / baby.ru
- The former and I had a separate budget. I was in constant stress: my husband earned much more than I did, but we still shared all the expenses in half. How could we even combine our two lifestyles? For example, he could effortlessly buy a new car, and I barely pulled the repair of my old wreck . I think that separate accounts still disconnect the pairs. © GGking41 / reddit
- My wife and I have a separate budget. If I want to spend my money on something ridiculous, for example, on a luxurious backgammon board, she can not object, because it is my money. If she wants to buy three dozen dresses, I am silent. We shared the total costs. Once upon a time, we divided them 50 by 50. Then I began to earn more than she, so now we divide the expenses in the ratio of 80/20 or 90 / 10. If we go out to eat or have fun, I cry. As for the mortgage, she pays X money, and I pay 5X money. Using a spreadsheet in Excel, we track who paid how much, and we know in what shares we own our house. For example, I currently own 81% of the house, and she owns 19%. So if we decide to sell it, then I will get 81% of the cash, and she – 19%. My wife and I just celebrated 21 years of marriage, and we had a lot of common financial transactions: we bought 5 houses, set up brokerage accounts and hedge funds, moved and changed jobs. And never arose the need to establish a joint budget. © Jared Dillian / Quora
- My wife spends her personal money on all nonsense at the speed of light, and then launches her hands in our common account. When money runs out and there is not enough even for basic necessities (such as food and household appliances), conflicts begin. So, trying to ensure “compliance with the budget”, I feel like a tyrant. Her favorite excuse: “Do not blame me, blame your stupid budget . ” So here is my advice to you: never let yourself go beyond the budget – this is the only way to get close to not flying into the pipe. © akatherder / reddit
- My mother had been addicted to shopping for many years, and she opened a bunch of credit accounts without her father’s knowledge. She even had a secret mailbox for accounts so dad wouldn’t recognize. Fast forward to my 20 years. This is the first time I am requesting an extract on my credit history and find that I have owned a credit card since I was 11 years old. Thank you mom. © axolotlaxolotl / reddit
- In the process of divorce, it turned out that my almost ex-wife had secret credit cards totaling $ 30 thousand in her name. I had to pay half to get rid of her. © FatRichard45 / reddit
What financial advice would you give to people who are just starting a life together?
Preview photo Credit by Anonymous / Quora